So many bloggers posted about “kissing” for K, inspiring me to tell my own odd tale of my first kiss. With this guy:
Ozzy Osbourne
It was that hazy time period between daguerreotypes and upwardly mobile megapixel Smartphone cameras… ah yes, the 80s.
It was a huge day in rock for me. My dad even let me skip school.
Ozzy was coming to town.
I received the Diary Of a Madman album for my 12th birthday and never looked back. Ozzy was a huge part of my rock and roll education. So when it was announced (on that old talking box known as a ‘radio’) that Ozzy would be signing autographs at the House of Guitars (amazing music store) in my hometown, I had to go. And as I stood in line for what felt like hours, waiting to approach the Prince of Darkness’ throne, I knew what I wanted to ask him.
He was holding court in a small room at the back of the store; the amplifier room, if I remember correctly. No scepter in his hands, just a Sharpie marker. I stepped away from my fellow commoners and was granted access up the steps. On shaking legs, I made it to the front of his table. He asked me my name, and as I stared, watching him scrawl an autograph for me, I knew what I had to ask him. It was a crazy request. But my fourteen year old brain rationalized it thus: IF YOU DON’T ASK HIM NOW, YOU WILL REGRET IT FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE. (Ah, the timeless teenage flair for the dramatic.)
ASK HIM!
“Can I give you a kiss?”
And he responded with “sure, sweetheart” in that murmuring Brummie accent, leaned over his table and gave me a very sweet peck on the lips.
“Your lips touched bat lips!” Yeah, I got a few comments like that from my schoolmates. Reminiscent of Lucy Van Pelt running around after Snoopy kissed her, yelling, “Yech, blech! My lips touched dog lips!”
BAT LIPS!
While Ozzy’s infamous bat-biting incident had earned him a series of rabies shots a couple of years before, I deemed him to be a relatively safe first kissing specimen. He wasn’t foaming at the mouth, after all. And I can safely say I’ve never had a boy NOT kiss me since at the risk of 3rd degree bat germs.
And that, my friends, was the first kiss I had ever received from a ‘boy’ – Ozzy Osbourne, January 1984. Had our social networks existed back then, I probably would have an Instagram pic to prove it, a hundred ‘likes’ on my facebook status and a Tweet along the lines of: OMG I just kissed @OfficialOzzy on the lips! #mylifeiscomplete!
But all I have are the memories….and a 29 year old autograph. I pulled it out the other day from between the pages of my wedding photo album – yes, it has a place of honor there – to snap a pic of it to share here. Brittle with age, it’s yellowing like those fake treasure maps we tried to make look old when we were kids by staining them with tea and ironing the edges. But it’s the real deal, and a memory to treasure for all time: my lips kissing bat lips.
It was a really nice first kiss.
To Jessica, Love Ozzy Osbourne
Aw, he even signed ‘love’!
Thanks for stopping by, Erick. Great pic, right? LOL
Oh my gosh! Amazing!!!!!!! Wish I could say my first kiss was so cool. DEFINITELY wasn’t!
Ha ha thanks Kelly. It makes for a good story! 🙂
Awesome…..wow….you are something else!
Coming from you, I will take that as the highest compliment. 🙂 xo
AAAAHHHH!!! FINALLY!! I’ve been waiting for this story since you teased me with it months ago. Best story, and first kiss, ever.
Sorry to have kept you in suspense this whole time!
A hundred likes? That would have gone viral… and not in the infection way 😉 So glad you shared this story!
Ha, love it! Thanks!
thats a great story~! love it!!
Thanks for stopping by, Paul. Yes, too bad you weren’t there with your camera, ha ha.
Awe waht a cute story.I can imagine what it felt like when you were fourteen,amazing.
Anne/
Is Anyone There
Thanks for stopping by! Hard to believe it was almost 30 years ago. Time flies!
Great story! Just catching up on your AtoZ. Pretty cool stuff xxx
How funny. I just popped over to see what Bibsey’s been doing. Loved the bday pics! And I responded to your K post about being inspired by your kissing piece. 🙂
I know! *in best Monica from Friends accent* I have just seen your comment. It’s almost realtime! x
It’s nice to know he’s a softie in real life. LOL
LOL… although I see he is making the headlines again right now with marriage troubles. Never a dull moment…
Oh, I love this!
LOL thanks.